November 24, 2014

More sick people since de floods

De Hong Kong people start to protest a long time now. And dem still deh pun de streets. Now some people in Mexico start to protest. People all over de world does have dem own reason fuh protest. Some good, some bad. But at least dem have a reason.
In Guyana, Green Jah does love to start a protest, but wid out reason. Green Jah look at lil too much news, see all whah happenin, and he start up. Right away God get vex and send de rain to flood out GT.
Green Jah is a man who does protest inside and outside Parliament. And he does call pun all and sundry to join he. Is a good ting most of de people got better sense than Green Jah, includin dem Lindenians.
Before de Guvament change, it never used to have any protest. Every body used to stay in dem house, tek whah ever de Guvament give dem (or don’t give dem), and bear strain. Old people used to seh yuh have to bear yuh chafe.
Plus people had to go to wuk fuh lil bit pay, line up fuh gas fuh dem car if dem coulda afford one, and whenever dem need to use a phone, dem had to go down de road to beg to borrow one. At that time only Burnt Ham people had phones.
Dem was de days Adumb use to con people wid some ting nice in de front page of every day of de Con-icle paper. Now is de same crookishness goin on. Just that nowadays, Adumb turn from a con man to a Kocheur man.
But since tings in de country start to get better, people findin other reasons to protest. Pullice man Sicken seh some ting sick bout women and next day a setta sick women line up in fronta de Brickdam Pullice Station.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! And all of dem dress up (or down?) in de same way Sicken talk bout. Is a lotta sick people deh bout since de floods!

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Guyana need less of More

Old people seh too much of one ting does never be good. That is why old people does advise young people to be satisified with a lil bit of every ting and not to want too much of any ting. Is only de scraven kinda people who don’t listen to this kinda advice.

But a lotta people don’t listen to old people, so dem belly does be full, but dem eye does never be full. So some people always want more of some ting. And Guyana gettin more of every ting these days.

More rain and more floods in de whole country. More garbage floatin up in GT. More schools closin every time a lil drizzle fall in GT. More students runnin around de place when it ain’t got school.

More public servants ain’t wukkin. More duty free scam. More remigrants who don’t even turn up to court when dem get charge fuh crookishness. More lawsuits against de Kocheur paper. More threats to de Gee-RA boss man. And more frustration fuh Lil Johnny from Trotman.

More fuel tax. More protest from AP-NOO. More fast food. More supermarkets. More people thiefin. More people tryin to put drugs in dem suitcase when dem goin away. More road accidents and more people gettin killed pun de roads. More gramoxone and more suicides.

More Police men tekking bribes and more animals pun de road, including dem mini bus and taxi drivers, who drivin just like how wild animals does run in de jungle. More fake driver’s licence givin away fuh a price and more people who can’t drive.

Now it gotta More who mek a deal not to send a En-More man to jail and it gotta another More who trying to defend a man who supposed to end up in jail. That’s de man who had want more money than whah de bank used to pay he, so he tek $69.9 million more.

Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! At this stage, Guyana ain’t need more of any ting. In fact, if any ting, Guyana need less of More.

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GT, de world and de underworld

GT used to mean George Town a long time ago. People used to call it de garden city. Now GT mean Garbage Town. De whole country know that. Almost de whole world know that too, because GT people deh almost all over de world.
Some GT people even deh in de underworld, like de Paper Man. That, fuh sure, ain’t no hearsay. It got full documentation to that effect right among de same worlda people who Paper Man like to run to.
Is no wonder Paper Man never doubt de underworld story. Now he like to tink that he own de world. But one of he own reporter seh Paper Man only deh in he own lil world, ever since he two Lexus world get tek way.
De reporter even seh that right now Paper Man wish it was de end of de world. But Paper Man world only got one endin. That gon be inside four wall wid a lil grill window. And that is de Camp Street world.
As usual when de rain start to fall in GT, Green Ham does start to hide, not only from GT, but from de whole world. And de other Green does turn yellow and hide in Green Ham world. But every ting whah dem doin (or not doin) deh in plain sight fuh de whole world. On de other hand, Roy Stone does deh in a different world.
So no Greens in sight, except fuh Green Jah of course who does run de AP-NOO world. After all, de rains give he another reason to protest on another day and wid another setta people in dem own world. But right now Green Jah still can’t put foot in de Linden world.
Last time Green Jah been to de Linden world, de Kiss Woman turn he whole world upside down. Now Green Jah can’t figure out whah in de world he must do or don’t do.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! Meantime, Rum Jhaat and Nagga Man hidin from de world at large, albeit, wid two large. That is dem world.

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Wonder if Green Jah gon getta wuk

A very sensible letter writer write a letter de other day and seh how Poopnarine done live out he political usefulness. That’s a lotta big words just to tell a man that he is a No-Good. And long ago de old people used to put a “F” word between de “No” and de “Good”.

But Poopnarine is done a old man arready. So old people don’t diss dem mattie old people by usin that kinda language, even though de NFG title fit Poopnarine perfectly a long time now.

Is no wonder Green Jah don’t want Poopnarine poopin around in de AP-NOO set up any more. In fact, not even de W-Pee-Hey want Poopnarine poopin in dem party any more either. Dem know that gon be messin wid pee plus poop.

Wid a man at Poopnarine age, not even a doctor can know how much peein and poopin he capable of. And wid whah tek place at de AP-NOO protest de other day, it look like he capable of a lotta poop.

A reporter seh he see Poopnarine buyin green guava de other day and he did’t know why. Is only after Poopnarine done talk de other night at de AP-NOO rally that he realise why he had need so many small round lookin tings.

Lucky de green guava had wuk in time fuh Rum Jhaat and de Nagga Man. But is a pity it don’t wuk all de time fuh dem.

Well, just like how a crab ketcher can’t ketch crab wid out gettin mud pun he skin, is de same way Green Jah he self gettin just as messy as de poopin in he party. Soon dem might end up as a party of poopers wid Poopnarine leadin that section, but only if Green Jah change he mind.

Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! And was more poop de other day when Green Jah seh if he turn de Prezzi, certain people wid criminal connections gon can’t wuk wid he Guvament. So wonder if Green Jah gon getta wuk?

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Boycott is de new word

Boycott is suddenly de new buzz word in Guyana. These days any time any body open dem mouth, that word comin out, especially dem ones who playin politricks. De scholar Poopert usin it. Curlene usin it. Green Jah usin it. Rum Jhaat using it. De Nagga Man usin it. Rambo usin it. And even de Man Kisser usin it.
Nuff a dem wanna boycott de GTimes, dem wanna boycott businesses in de country, and dem wanna boycott de Guvament. And dem public servants always wanna boycott de wuk whah dem gettin pay to do.
Of course, Uncle Rafeel done boycott Lil Johnny. So Lil Johnny was gettin traumatise then by he own uncle and he gettin Trotmanise now by de same uncle.
Poopert seh he gon boycott GTimes and just like how he boycott Rodney and cut he throat when he join up wid de Pee-Hen-Cee. Some body seh Poopert only behavin so because he vex since Green Jah boycott he way ahead of de next elections. Now it ain’t got nobody leff to boycott poor Poopert.
No Gel Hugly was also vex when Rum Jhaat boycott he and tell de KFC to put Nagga Man as de Presidential Candicate. That was when Pattieson seh he also woulda run fuh de position if Rum Jhaat and Nagga Man didn’t boycott he.
Curlene seh she gon boycott all de businesses and right away Green Jah seh he gon boycott she. De other day both Rum Jhaat and Nagga Man boycott de APNU rally. And de Pee-Pee-Pee/Cee had boycott de two of dem after de party realise dem was no good.
As soon as Paper Man hear all that, he seh he wanna boycott all he court dates, even de one wheh he rob de Guvmanent over $100 million in taxes, plus de other one wheh he rob de S*ity Council another setta millions. And not too long ago he tell de remigrants to boycott de court.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! But no matter whah he do, Camp Street ain’t gon boycott de Paper Man.

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Pay back is a bitch

De famous Stanford was a man who come to de Caribbean and show de Waste Indies Cricket Board how to run cricket. That is because de Waste Indian fellas, wid some of dem right here in Guyana, had only know how to run down cricket. A good example is how dem Guyanese fellas run down cricket in Guyana.

Right now de Waste Indies Board need some of that same Stanford money to pay back India. But it was not too long ago that Stanford he self couldn’ta pay back dem people who he tek money from. So he end up in a nice place fuh a long time, and that time ain’t even done yet.

Now de Waste Indies Board also can’t pay back who dem borrow from. So is likely that dem fellas on de Board gon also end up in a nice place like Stanford, fuh a long time too. After all whah goes fuh one should go fuh all. Imrun might have to run fuh he life wid all dem lies whah he tellin pun de Waste Indies website.

And talkin bout pay back, de paper man and he headitor like talk bout other people money, even though dem still can’t seh wheh paper man money come from, even though de whole of Guyana know. Well, dem gon soon run to some of dem same people on dem knees when dem ain’t able pay fuh all dem lawsuits. Soon dem gon be wearing jumpsuits.

And that gon be a different kinda payback. So it gon be fitting when dem end up in a nice place fuh a long time just like Stanford and dem fellas from de Waste Indies Board. Old people right when dem seh birds of a feather does flock together.

Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! Well, de Opposition still to ketch dem right level wid this whole ting bout payback. Is only now dem learning that payback is a bitch. And Rum Jhaat and Poopert surely behavin like two bitches!

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A reason fuh every ting

Old people seh it always gotta reason fuh de season. Soon Christmas gon be de reason fuh de season. It always gotta reason fuh every ting.
De Prezzi done give a reason why he prorogue de Parliament. Is simply because he ain’t able deal wid dem rogues no more. One rogue does be a big problem fuh de Pullice, so imagine how hard it musbe fuh de Prezzi to deal wid 33 rogues.

Even Burnt Ham musta had some God in he when he allow that part of de Constitution to remain. After all, it got bad in de best of us and good in de baddest of us.
It musbe a reason why Lil Lohnny try to tek he own life de other day. And why he behavin like he is a troubled young man. It musbe that somebody trouble he when he was a lil boy and now he gon remain troubled fuh life.

And now de man who cause all de touble ain’t want trouble wid he. If only de Cee-Jay could see whah touble he causin now, he probably woulda allow de troubled young man to talk out all he troubles.

It musbe a reason too why Joel rhyme with Jewel. Joel de headitor, who get jail in de You-K fuh de same ting whah de paper man doin right hey in Guyana, done deh in jail.
And dem fellas done change he name from Joel to Jewel. Joel he self seh if he had only know de place was so nice, he wouldn’ta waste de court time.

Back hey in Guyana, it musbe a reason why paper man name rhyme wid hen and de headitor name rhyme wid madam. A reporter seh is a long time now one is a hen and de other is a madam.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! De reporter further seh that it is also no coincidence that Len deh in de same vein wid hen and Gl**!

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Rum Jhaat can’t mek up he mind

Rum Jhaat is a man who does change he mouth from one minute to de other. One minute he seh he and de whole of de KFC gon join wid Green Jah and de whole of de HAPNU. Next minute he seh he never seh so, and that he not a part of any ting whah does join wid something else.

One of Rum Jhaat 7-Owe-4 pardna seh he not sure if de problem is that Rum Jhaat don’t wanna join up wid any ting, or he ain’t got nutten to bring to join up wid.

One minute Rum Jhaat seh he gon join de protest and de next minute he seh he ain’t gon be part of the protest. Now Rum Jhaat seh although he was never part de plannin fuh de protest, he still supportin de protest.

Rum Jhaat sound like de kinda man who just can’t mek up he mind bout whah he want from whah he ain’t want. Some body seh that is because Rum Jhat ain’t gotta mind of he own and he can’t even mind he own business.

De one ting Rum Jhaat know fuh sure whah he want is dem bottles whah does disappear in he hand at 7-Owe-4. That is de one ting bout which Rum Jhaat does never change he mind or he mouth. And if yuh know Rum Jhaat, he does change he mind bout a lotta tings.

Rum Jhaat change he mind bout de P-P-Pee/C, so he tek up with de KFC. Now he wanna change back he mind, but he still got two mind, so he can’t mek up he own mind. But whah he ain’t know is that de P-P-Pee/C done mek up dem mind bout he, and that mind ain’t gon change.

It got to be that Rum Jhaat and Khurshi* got de same kinda mind. Because one day Khurshi* talk he mind and seh he friken de paper man like cat, and de next week he seh that had to be only in de reporter mind.

Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! Thank de almighty fuh phone recordings!

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Rafeel wanna shut up Johnny fuh good

It ain’t look like Lil Johnny can get justice in he own country wheh he born and grow. Cat-Hee-Haw was tryin to get Lil Johnny de other day to run away to Tee-Tee. She even send Lil Johnny a email and tell he so.

But de lil boy who now turn a young man ain’t fall fuh that. Lil Johnny seh he just want justice. Ten years ago Cat-Hee-Haw coulda tell Lil Johnny any ting and he woulda do it. Ten years ago Uncle Rafeel coulda tell Lil Johnny any ting and he woulda do it. Ten years ago Uncle Rafeel coulda do Lil Johnny anything and he woulda stay quiet.

Even if Cee-Hen-S raise up de Justice Fuh All party from de dead Lil Johnny might not get justice.

And if yuh know See-Hen, is a long time since he raise up any ting from de dead. Last time was that time some time back when he mek de lil gyurl run out de house and call fuh she mammy.

So tings ain’t lookin good fuh Lil Johnny. Fuh poor Lil Johnny, is a long time tings ain’t lookin up.

There was a time when he used to had to do a lotta lookin up bout 10 years ago to Uncle Rafeel. That was when Uncle Rafeel used to really look down on de poor lil boy.

Lil Johnny even seh it used to be every afternoon. So is since then Lil Johnny can’t ketch he level. Is funny how Uncle Rafeel accusin de Prezzi of dictatorship now when he was Lil Johnny dictator bout 10 years ago.

That was a time when Uncle Rafeel coulda tell Lil Johnny to do any ting whether he like it or not. As far as Uncle Rafeel concern, Lil Johnny had to keep he mouth shut and only open it when Uncle Rafeel seh so.

Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! So it must he hard fuh Lil Johnny who now wanna open he mouth and Uncle Rafeel tellin he to shut up!

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Prezzi show dem he can do it

A lotta people used to run dem mouth and seh de Prezzi is a weak man. Dem seh de Prezzi can’t mek decisions. Dem even seh de Prezzi doin whah other people seh and that he ain’t strong enuff to be a Prezzi.

Rum Jhaat, who can’t even run he own party, was one of dem who seh so. Green Jah, who can’t even control Oscar de bite man and Vanessa de kiss woman, seh de same ting. Stoopert had side wid Green Jah. But since he turn to Poopert, not even Green Jah want he.

Plus Nagga Man went along wid de flow, as he accustom to doin all he life. De only flow whah Nagga Man used to control by he self is de flow from a flattie. But nowadays de flow is from a large because Nagga Man believe in de more de merryer. Just that wid Nagga Man, is de more he get de stupider he get.

Well, de Prezzi do it just yesterday even though dem seh he can’t do it. If any ting, is Rum Jhaat, Green Jah and de rest of dem who can’t do it. If any of these men still had any doubt, de Prezzi show dem how he can do it.

And if dem still doubt, de Prezzi might just decide to do it again fuh dem. In fact, if any ting, is Rum Jhaat, Green Jah and de rest of dem who can’t do it. One time de Prezzi had dare dem straight to dem face to do it.

That was when de Prezzi had tell dem to do it when dem threaten de Prezzi wid No-Confidence Motion. De Prezzi simply tell dem “do it”. Up to now, not Rummie, not Greenie and not Nagga ever stand up to do it.

Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! No body ain’t sure if de problem is de ‘standin up’ or de ‘doin’. Or it could be both, because none of dem never stand up to do it!

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